FHE notes

These are my notes from a class I taught about holding Family Home Evening with teenagers.

In teaching teens I think the most important thing is teaching by example and being consistent.

Some teens in the scriptures, The stripling warriors did not have to wonder what their parents believed.

They said, “We do not doubt our mothers knew it!”  Alma 56:47-48

They need to see u live the gospel daily in our lives……I was secretly happy when they burst into my room and interrupted my prayers

They know I love the scriptures because they are always open on my chair.

I think it is equally important for teens to teach and prepare the lessons.

Our lessons can sometimes turn into lectures

When teens teach - first of all they learn more   saw this YW  know it’s true with myself  (sacrament talk this week)

They are able to always pass off a personal progress or duty to God if they just look at a requirement to go with the lesson.

We always used our FHE to accomplish these church programs.

I would like to put a plug in for my new calling - Family History

Teri Forsyth came to our home for a FHE and talked to us about F History and answered questions, taught anything we wanted to know

I can do this for you!!!

I believe most of our FHE involved a bowl of ice-cream.   It was the reward for listening and sometimes it was eaten while we discussed a lesson so that certain children would stay in the room and not stand on their head while the lesson was going on

Haha  That reminds me….she …..know you probably know who it is

we were reading scriptures one night and she would never listen.  She loved to be all over the room, disrupting, discracting, dancing around….

All of the sudden I told her to act our (patominme) what was being said.

I wish I could remember the scripture but she made up a dance to it.

It worked for that night.  She had to listen to know what dance move to perform.   :)

Which also relates to my next story…….I’m just giving you a feeling that FHE at our house was never perfect.  No Way.

Every week we would say what song should we sing.   We let the kids

play the hymn for part of their piano practice.   There were only a few

they knew.  Kaitlyn played we Thank Thee O God”  every time.

Another well sung song was There is Beauty All Around - When there’s love at home.   We told the kids we would be singing it every week until we actually had Love At Home.  It became such a well known family song that I had the words cut in huge vinyl and put it up on my wall.  Still there and I like it for the memories.

FHE evolves a lot as the kids grow .  I always had a wide range of ages…trying to find something to keep the younger interested and teach something new was a challenge  - thus the ice cream

The older kids have homework, they had jobs to go to, today Dance for Kaitlyn takes over a lot of our family time.  

Sometimes the lessons just have to be quick.  Sometimes they are only at 10 pm with a scripture and a question.   

I believe that CONSISTENCY is more important than almost anything else.     The lesson may be short, but they could get something out of that 

But if you lose the consistency…..the thought that this is something our family does  Every week.   You lose them to all the other things.   We are

still not perfect because of the dance schedule…..It’s a big question - are we doing the right thing in letting her dance  - Because over the years the basketball coaches, football coaches and dance teachers and then even employers demanded that our kids be there to participate 

So we do the best we can…   I really wish everyone would respect Monday evenings.   We struggle wondering if we should not allow them to participate in those activities?  But then with teens that can also build resentment.   Its a very fine line to walk.   But consistency    Teaching and spending some meaningful time together is what is important.  And I hope that is happening    that is the goal

ideas   mine are usually for a quick lesson   New Era was our standard

lesson.  Used it each month.  Message from the first Presidency

felt like this was an inspired message my teens should hear.

love the gospel art kit.   if nothing else  someone reads the back of it and then discuss what you got out of it.

A good church video movie can be a hit with popcorn on more relaxed nights   - discuss after the movie

Use the For Strength of Youth….review one standard each week

I still remember the lesson when we talked about music standards.

EFY videos - when they go to EFY  reinforce the theme and things they learned.  each video has like 5 different lessons on them.

We used them a lot and I can still go pull out an old one that the younger kids haven’t seen or remember

Popular youth speakers  John Bytheway, Hank Smith—- have great CD’s talks    Sometimes listen in the car on the way somewhere 

I know John Bytheway has a DVD  about Standards and Basketball standards  and then you could play basketball

Scripture Rock  reinforce my kids can sing those sciptures and some really long ones.   loved those 

Used book called  “How” by John Hilton a lot!  so many great object lessons.  It Got lots of use.

Again I will  make the plug for Family History spent some time loading in photos, typing up stories

indexing

Good activities - Go with neighbors play baseball.

We often went to Jordan ridge park  took a picnic  used tennis courts and all the playground - great place for wide age ranges.

Often summer the kids loved to have the lesson on the back patio.  They would   

lay down on chairs and we could keep their attention that way.

We made a Tree of life - spread out a rope and put on a blindfold  to try and find way with others yelling and confusing them.

Practical lessons - These kids will leave your home sooner than you realize.  Teach them some cooking skills  - do it in fun ways, perhaps with challenges.

I highly recommend ironing and laundry skills   - One of my kids when they went to college didn’t know about the lint trap needing to be emptied.  Ben has a great mission pictures holding up a sweater that was shrunk down to doll size because he didn’t know you can’t wash and dry wool

Invite the missionaries over for dinner.  We’ve had some great dinners with the Elders in our home.

Even better invite the neighbors also. 

Service projects….help neighbors with yard work,  make a treat and  deliver.  Thanksgiving boxes

Serve each other:

Mom has very one write our names on a piece of paper along with something we would like done in the next 15 minutes. Here is what we wrote:

• Dad: Clean the garage for five minutes.

• Mom: Put all the winter clothing in the closet and remove all the summer stuff and put in boxes.

• College age student: Put the blue basket of laundry in the washer.

• High School Son: Make me two sandwiches.

• Middle school daughter: Vacuum my room.

When I tried this with my two kids for Family Night this week the teens wanted massages. :)

Chris wanted dinner fixed (ha ha luckily I drew his name) and I wanted laundry folded.    It was actually fun that the Brycen and Kaitlyn drew each other for the massages because they spent time together serving each other.   I really liked that!

Testimony of FHE    

Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in loe and righteousness   and we will be accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

The stripling warriors had been taught from youth and now as youth they were exceedingly valiant for courage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all—they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.

 21 Yea, they were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him.  Alma 53:20-21

I KNOW the family is ordained of God and is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of his children.